π250 Ways to Dieπ
Forums βΊ General Discussion βΊ π250 Ways to Dieπ-
You are an ISIS radical & you post a selfie on social media of yourself in front of the local ISIS headquarters. You also brag about all of the capabilities that headquarters has. The U.S. Military is able to identify the building and, several days later, they bomb the shit out of it. You discover, to your horror, that there are no virgins waiting for ass hats on the other side.
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224 left
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Struck by lightning
224 to go -
In the middle of a nasty thunderstorm, your mom caught you and your sister having sex. After she joined in, your dad got home from work early and discovered you all in the bedroom. He decided to strip nekked and sit in the corner masturbating while enjoying the show. Lighting struck the tree in the backyard and a branch fell through the roof, crushing the bed. Luckily, you guys had moved into the bathtub by this point so you were unphased. Your dad, being the brilliant man he is, decided it would be a good idea to videotape the action. He stands up on the toilet with his camcorder (one of gigantic old-school ones), and proceeds to slip, falling into the tub. On the way down the camcorder crushes your sister's skull and she bleeds out in the tub while your father decides he needs to climax in you before calling 911. 4nick8r arrives with his paramedic buddies to discover the scene. He slips on the water on the bathroom floor and his large body lands on top of your naked body, killing you on impact.
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You go to blow your nose with a tissue, but unfortunately there's a giant poisonous spider in the tissue box. It bites you and you proceed to have your insides predigested for the now-dead arachnid.
222 to go. -
βΡΞΞαΞΔΏβ wrote:
ππππ. Large body???? I'm only 265lbs. π’In the middle of a nasty thunderstorm, your mom caught you and your sister having sex. He decided to strip nekked and sit in the corner masturbating while enjoying the show. Lighting struck the tree in the backyard and a branch fell through the roof, crushing the bed. Luckily, you guys had moved into the bathtub by this point so you were unphased. Your dad, being the brilliant man he is, decided it would be a good idea to videotape the action. He stands up on the toilet with his camcorder and proceeds to slip, falling into the tub. On the way down the camcorder crushes your sister's skull and she bleeds out in the tub while your father decides he needs to climax in you before calling 911. 4nick8r arrives with his paramedic buddies to discover the scene. He slips on the water on the bathroom floor and his large body lands on top of your naked body, killing you on impact. 223
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You are constipated and burst a blood vessel in your brain trying to force π© out. What sucks the most is that you were wearing pink underwear when you died and now everyone thinks you were gay.
220 to go(I doubled up on my last oneππ») -
While wearing your frilly pink underwear, the gerbil that you and [dday] were experimenting with ate you from the inside out.
219 -
Nationally televised autoerotic asphyxiation.
218 to go. -
Tried to cheat the hooker out of her fee. Pimp beat you with his cane.
217 to go. -
You're staying in a North Korean hotel, when it catches on fire and the area is cordoned off by the officials to stop people from losing faith in the engineering skills of the Supreme Leader. You suffocate on the smoke.
Perhaps taking a vacation to Best Korea wasn't such a good idea after all.
216 to go. -
Trampled to death by a pack of rabid Corgis.
215 to go -
Impaled by the falling rocks on the Seward Highway
214 to go -
Your head gets splattered on a barn door when a hurricane strikes during your trip to the countryside.
213 to go. -
Shortly after walking into the Salty Splatoon you fatally slip on a banana peel.
212 -
You witness a murder and subsequently have a heart attack.
211 to go. -
You are eating baked beans at the neighborhood bbq party when a significant fart begins to boil in your lower abdomen. You are polite, and decide to hold it in... But it only gets worse. After 20 minutes of cringing and sweating, you can't hold it in and the fart erupts through your body, blowing your intestines out your ass. You are experiencing some severe bleeding and your wife phones an ambulance. Paramedics arrive, but refuse to get near you because it could put themselves at risk. An autopsy concluded that you died of the stench long before the bleeding could have killed you.
210 to go -
You are eating baked beans at the neighborhood bbq party when a significant fart begins to boil in your lower abdomen. You are polite, and decide to hold it in... But then you get hit by a car, which kills you and renders your efforts futile.
209 to go. -
While running down the stairs with open scissors you slipped, and the rest is self explanatory, nevertheless you died a rebel's death.
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YOU wrote:
208While running down the stairs with open scissors you slipped, and the rest is self explanatory, nevertheless you died a rebel's death.
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You jab a pen into your eye and run out of a 6th story window. It's interesting enough to make headlines across the country.
207 to go. -
Your just sitting on a bench enjoying a hot dog on a typical Thursday afternoon when, suddenly, things begin to get, well... Very untypical. Some random guy falls from the sky. Luckily, he misses you by a yard. Unfortunately, a pen slips between the hot dog buns unnoticed and you scarf your last bite before returning to work. Your eyes spring wide open as you realize you have a pen stuck in your throat. You choke and die. You make the newspaper and headlines across America read: "MAN DIES WHILE ANOTHER MAN'S PENIS IN HIS MOUTH". The typo goes uncorected and the cause of death on your tombstone reads "PENIS IN MOUTH". That's just great. Now you'll always be know as "that fagot who choked on a dick"
208 to go -
ππ»206 to go. Oops
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