Bad Jokes V1
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Post your ridiculously bad jokes here
A Roman walks into a bar, sticks two fingers up to the barman and says, "Five beers please."
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Velcro, what a rip-off
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Descartes walks into a bar, and the batman says 'A pint, is it?'
Descartes says 'I think not!' and vanishes -
What did the cheese say to himself in the mirror?
Hallou-mi
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Conjunctivitis.com, now there's a site for sore eyes!
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💖Swagger💖 wrote:
Brilliant😁Conjunctivitis.com, now there's a site for sore eyes!
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So I phoned up the spiritual leader of tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck.... turns out I phoned dial a lama.
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What did the dog say to the cat?
Nothing, dogs can't talk. -
What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?
He wiped.
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A sadist and a masochist meet on the street.
The masochist says, "Hurt me, hurt me."
And the sadist says, "No." -
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
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I got arrested for playing chess in the street. I said "it's because I'm black, isn't it?"
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Sentinel wrote:
👍What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Not the little girl.
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I've just finished a book I wrote on penguins. Come to think of it, paper would have been better.
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Sentinel wrote:
I actually laughed and snorted out loud and got a weird look from a stranger when I read that oneWhy did the little girl fall off of the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Not the little girl.
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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole?
PhilWhat do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool?
BobWhat do you call a girl with no arms and no legs on the beach?
Sandy -
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream ?
He got hit by a bus.
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What did the little kid with no legs get for Christmas?
Cancer.
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Sentinel wrote:
Lol, you're sick!!! 😜What did the little kid with no legs get for Christmas?
Cancer.
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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying on the floor?
- matt -
A dyslexic man wallks into a bra
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What's the difference between jelly and jam?
-You can't jelly your dick in a girls mouth. -
Went to the zoo. There was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned
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I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
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Always remember that you are unique; just like everyone else.
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I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.
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Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.
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When is the best time to go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty.
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A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says, "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
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I must be the only man in the world whose bowling pins aren't unionized. They never go on strike.
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Jesus walks into a hotel, puts three nails on the counter, and asks the desk clerk "can you put me up for the night?"
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